Living in the Netherlands with kids can be exciting—but also emotionally challenging—especially for expat families raising children far from extended family support. In this article, we explore the realities of parenting in the Netherlands, how Dutch parenting culture differs, and ways international families can thrive without traditional support systems.
What Makes Parenting in the Netherlands Unique?
Dutch parenting is often praised for being calm, balanced, and child-centered. The Netherlands is consistently ranked one of the best places in the world to raise children, thanks to its safe cities, high-quality education, and family-friendly policies.
Some defining traits of Dutch parenting include:
- Independence from an early age
- Strong emphasis on routine and simplicity
- Plenty of outdoor and unstructured playtime
- Open communication and emotional support
The Challenge of Raising Kids Far from Family
For many expat families, one of the hardest parts of parenting abroad is doing it without close family nearby. This distance can present both practical and emotional challenges:
- No grandparents to help with childcare or emergencies
- Feeling isolated during milestones or tough days
- No familiar cultural traditions during holidays and birthdays
- Balancing work and parenting without a support network
Even with reliable daycare and excellent schools in the Netherlands, there’s no substitute for the emotional support that family can provide.
How Expat Families Cope Without Family Support
Despite these challenges, many international parents in the Netherlands find creative ways to build community and support:
1. Create a “Chosen Family”
Build friendships with other parents in your neighborhood, school, or expat community. These friendships often become as important as blood ties.
2. Use Dutch Childcare Options
The Netherlands offers excellent childcare services (kinderopvang), including flexible daycare and after-school programs that help parents manage work-life balance.
3. Join Parenting and Expat Communities
Local Facebook groups, Meetup events, playgroups, and school parent networks are great for connecting with others in similar situations.
4. Stay Connected Digitally
Use tools like Zoom, WhatsApp, and shared photo albums to stay in touch with relatives abroad and include them in your family life from a distance.
Tips for Parenting Abroad Successfully
If you’re raising kids in the Netherlands far from family, these tips can help you thrive:
- Embrace the Dutch parenting style: Allow more independence and trust in your child’s development.
- Don’t be afraid to ask for help: Neighbors, teachers, and friends can become part of your support system.
- Celebrate small wins: Even tiny victories matter when you’re doing this without your usual support network.
- Prioritize self-care: Take time for yourself, even if it’s just a quiet coffee or short walk alone.
Conclusion: You’re Not Alone
Parenting in the Netherlands as an expat is both rewarding and challenging. While being far from family can create emotional and logistical hurdles, it also opens the door to building new forms of community and resilience.
If you’re an international parent navigating life in the Netherlands, know that you are not alone. With time, support, and a little creativity, you can build a fulfilling family life—even far from home.
